What Is Attachment-Based Therapy?
How Your Early Relationships Shape You
We all learn how to connect with others based on our earliest relationships—usually with parents or caregivers.
These experiences teach us things like: Can I trust people to be there for me? Is it okay to show what I feel? Do I have to earn love—or can I expect it to be there?
If those early connections were unreliable, distant, or overwhelming, you might notice it still affects you today—maybe in anxiety about being left, pulling away when things get close, or feeling like you’re “too much” for others.
Attachment-based therapy helps you understand where these patterns come from, so you can start building relationships that feel more steady, respectful, and real—including the one you have with yourself.
What Therapy Looks Like
Talk About What Feels Hard—in a Way That Makes Sense to You
This approach isn’t about analyzing you or rushing into your past. It’s about having a place where you can be honest about what relationships have felt like—without needing to explain it all perfectly.
You might talk about:
- Feeling anxious when someone takes too long to text back
- Getting stuck in “people-pleasing” and not knowing who you are underneath
- Pushing people away even when you want connection
- Wondering why being close to others feels so uncomfortable—or like too much to manage
We’ll go at your pace. I’ll help you start to notice patterns, make sense of where they come from, and explore what might help things shift.
Is This for You?
Have You Ever Thought, “Why Do I Always Do This in Relationships?”
Attachment-based therapy can be helpful if:
- You keep ending up in relationships where you feel let down or unseen
- You worry people will leave—or feel like you can’t rely on anyone
- You shut down emotionally, even with people you care about
- You feel stuck between needing closeness and wanting space
Maybe you’ve done other types of therapy and they helped a bit—but didn’t really get to the root of things. This kind of work helps you understand what shaped your patterns, so they don’t keep running the show.
The Way I Work
Therapy That Meets You Where You Are
You don’t have to know how to talk about your past to begin this work. You don’t need a big story or a clear goal.
I’ll show up with presence and care, and I’ll ask questions that help us get curious about what’s happening—not in a clinical way, but in a way that helps you feel more like yourself.
Sometimes we’ll talk about childhood. Sometimes we’ll talk about something that happened yesterday. All of it matters.
I also draw on other approaches—like trauma-informed and person-centered therapy—to support this work in a way that’s thoughtful and grounded.
Why It Matters
Understanding Your Patterns Helps You Change Them
Often, the things that feel confusing or painful in your relationships now started as ways you learned to cope.
Attachment-based therapy helps you see those patterns more clearly—not to judge them, but to shift them.
That can mean:
- Being more at ease in relationships
- Knowing what you need—and asking for it
- Trusting others more easily
- Feeling more solid in yourself
These changes don’t happen overnight. But they are possible. And they tend to last—because they come from real understanding, not just surface-level strategies.
You Don’t Have to Keep Repeating the Same Pattern
Attachment-based therapy helps you understand how past experiences shape your relationships today—and how to start building better ones.
Therapy for adults. In-person sessions in North York and virtual therapy across Ontario.
Book a free consultation today and begin building practical tools for lasting change.
