If you’ve ever caught yourself thinking, “Why do I keep putting this off? What’s wrong with me? Am I just lazy?” — you’re not alone.
This is something I hear all the time in therapy. And if no one has said this to you yet, let me be the first:
Procrastination doesn’t mean you’re lazy.
In fact, laziness is usually the wrong word entirely.
Let’s talk about what’s really going on beneath procrastination — and how therapy can help you move through it.
Let’s Clear Something Up About Laziness
Taking a day off to rest, relax, or recharge is not laziness.
Rest is essential self-care, and everyone needs it sometimes — especially when life feels heavy or you’ve been carrying too much for too long.
Sometimes, that rest looks like spending the whole day on the couch, binge-watching a show, ignoring the laundry, and ordering dinner because cooking feels like too much. That’s okay. That’s human. Giving yourself permission to shut the world out for a while can be exactly what you need to reset.
Most people who call themselves lazy don’t actually fit the description.
True laziness isn’t about needing a break or having a low-energy day. It’s not even about struggling to get started. Laziness means avoiding responsibilities, making no effort to follow through, and — this is the important part — not caring about the consequences of inaction.
For example, if someone routinely skips work, misses deadlines, or lets people down without concern for how it affects their life or relationships — that’s closer to what we’d call lazy behaviour.
But if you’re procrastinating and feeling bad about it… if you care about doing well but feel stuck, anxious, tired, or overwhelmed — that alone tells us something important:
You’re not lazy. You’re stuck.
Why Do I Keep Procrastinating?
Procrastination is rarely about a lack of effort or willpower. It’s usually a reaction to something deeper going on inside.
Sometimes you might avoid a task simply because it’s boring, hard, or complicated — even when you know it’s important. That’s normal, and it’s part of why getting started can feel so tough.
Other times, you might be:
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Afraid of failing: “If I try and it’s not good enough, what does that say about me?”
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Overwhelmed: “There’s too much to do, I don’t even know where to start.”
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Burnt out or exhausted: “I want to care, but I just don’t have anything left in the tank.”
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Stuck in perfectionism: “If I can’t do it perfectly, maybe I shouldn’t do it at all.”
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Avoiding discomfort: “Thinking about this task makes me anxious or ashamed.”
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Disconnected from meaning: “This doesn’t feel important or fulfilling anymore.”
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Feeling depressed or low: “I want to do it… but I can’t seem to move.”
Sound familiar? If so, you’re not lazy — you’re responding to stress, fear, emotional overload, or sometimes a mix of these.
Sometimes that “day on the couch” turns into many days. If you find yourself avoiding more and more, and even rest doesn’t feel restful anymore — it could be a sign that burnout, anxiety, or depression is getting in the way.
That’s not a personal failure. It’s a signal that something needs care and attention.
It’s Not Laziness — It’s Your Nervous System Doing Its Best
Think of procrastination as your nervous system trying to protect you from feeling overwhelmed or stressed.
Avoiding a task gives you short-term relief. Your brain says, “Phew, we don’t have to deal with that right now.”
But as the deadline approaches or the to-do list grows, the stress builds — making it feel even harder to start.
Anxiety often fuels this cycle: fear of not doing something “well enough,” worry about being judged, or the constant mental buzz can turn even small tasks into big challenges.
Depression can make things even tougher. When your energy is low and motivation is scarce, even simple steps can feel like climbing a mountain. It’s not because you don’t care — it’s because your system is worn out.
Burnout is another piece of the puzzle. Taking on too much in one or more parts of life can leave you feeling depleted and overwhelmed — so much so that nothing gets done, even important things.
So while it might look like laziness on the surface, underneath there’s often:
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Emotional fatigue
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Internal pressure to get it “right”
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Fear of judgment or criticism
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Deep feelings of inadequacy or imposter syndrome
The solution isn’t to push yourself harder. It’s to understand what you’re protecting yourself from — and to build support around that.
How Therapy Can Help
You don’t need more shame. You need space to understand what’s really going on — and tools to move through it in a way that feels manageable, grounded, and kind.
In therapy, we’ll work together to:
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Figure out the reasons you’re procrastinating
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Explore how fear, pressure, burnout, anxiety, or depression might be showing up
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Learn practical tools to manage tasks and follow through
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Build a relationship with yourself that includes compassion, not criticism
You’re Not Lazy — You Just Might Need Support
If you're feeling stuck in a loop of avoidance, anxiety, and self-doubt, therapy can help you make sense of it — not by pushing harder, but by understanding what's really going on underneath.
Book a sesion to explore how therapy can help.
Online therapy for adults across Ontario, based in North York.
